Episode 23: Emergency Advice and Legal Whiplash

If anyone in the Transitionarium thought we’d get a break after Thanksgiving’s turkey fiasco, they were sorely mistaken.

The day began with staffers frantically scanning global news feeds: South Korea, at Trump’s suggestion, had declared a national emergency.

Instead of restoring order, it sparked ferocious protests.

The streets of Seoul were ablaze with demands for democracy, furious chantings, and giant “Not My Leader!” banners.

The ripple effects could be felt all the way in our gilded halls, where Trump was already preparing an “I Told You So” speech.

Part 1: A Call from a Frenzy

The President of South Korea, sounding like he hadn’t slept in days, reached Trump over a crackling line. “Mr. President-elect,” the voice pleaded, “your advice has… complicated things. The people are furious!”

Trump, reclining in his Victory Chair (an ostentatious recliner recently added to the Deciderium), waved off the panic. “Stay firm!” he commanded. “Think Erdogan, think Orban! Look at the Queen in England—she adores me. Knighted me twice, you know. Twice! And Vlad in Russia—best friends. They’re strong leaders. Strong leaders don’t fold, they rule forever.”

A muted gasp from Kellyanne and Jared, standing nearby:

Did Trump just claim friendship with Vlad again?

Did he seriously say the Queen knighted him twice?

International fact-checkers would have a field day, but when did that ever matter here?

Part 2: Knighted Twice?

The mention of the Queen’s admiration reverberated through the Transitionarium. Interns, who generally accept Trump’s claims with a shrug, exchanged bewildered looks. Had the Queen secretly flown over and tapped Trump on both shoulders with a jeweled sword? Twice? Eric Trump tried to recall any press coverage of such an event—no luck. Ivanka pursed her lips thoughtfully; maybe it happened in another timeline?

But no one dared question it aloud. Instead, staff just scribbled notes and prepared for the inevitable British outrage. Jared opened a secret crisis binder labeled “Royal Debunking Strategies.”

Part 3: Back to the Streets of Seoul

Trump continued lecturing the South Korean leader through the phone. “You must show strength. Tell them it’s for their own good! Once you’re in full control, they’ll thank you. Long-term, forever leaders—that’s the future.”

A muffled protest from the other end—something about democracy, allies, and this not being feudal Europe. Trump sighed. “Don’t listen to haters. Leadership is about ignoring complainers. Look at me—I ignore them all the time!”

Part 4: The Chesebro Conundrum

Meanwhile, domestic drama reared its head again. Kenneth Chesebro, a former Trump campaign lawyer who had pleaded guilty to conspiracy charges in the Georgia election meddling case, was now trying to wiggle out of that plea. This development leaked into the Transitionarium like a bad odor.

Kellyanne approached Trump gingerly, “Sir, Chesebro’s trying to invalidate his guilty plea.”

Trump blinked. “Who’s Chesebro again?”

“Your former campaign lawyer. He confessed in the Georgia case—remember?”
Trump shrugged. “If he wants out of a guilty plea, that’s his business. Tell him to be strong, like Erdogan, Orban, and the Queen—just, you know, in the legal sense. Maybe he can knight himself in court. It works, trust me.”

Part 5: Legal Loopholes and Ruling Forever

As reporters knocked on the Transitionarium’s reinforced doors seeking clarification, staffers scrambled. Was Trump now advising allies and associates to emulate autocrats at every turn? Probably yes. Did this surprise anyone? Probably no.

Jared quietly whispered to Ivanka, “This is going to look awful on CNN.”
Ivanka nodded. “But what doesn’t anymore?”

Eric tried to lighten the mood, “Maybe Chesebro can say he was under duress. Or alien mind control. Or blame the holograms—everyone loves blaming holograms.”

Part 6: Strength in Confusion

Trump ended the South Korea call with a confident, “They’ll love you eventually!” before slamming down the phone. He looked pleased with himself, as if he’d just secured a new golf course deal. Then, turning to his staff, he delivered a pep talk: “This is how winners do it. We advise, we conquer, we fix mistakes later.”

No one clapped. Kellyanne faked a cough, Jared pretended to read an important text, and Ivanka adjusted a vase of wilted roses on a table. Outside, the world spun into ever stranger orbits, and inside, we braced for tomorrow’s headlines.

Part 7: Coming Attractions

Between a South Korean crisis fueled by Trump’s counsel, a lawyer trying to reverse a guilty plea, and bizarre claims of royal knighthoods, we’d hit a surreal trifecta of scandal and disbelief. Yet we soldiered on—what else could we do?

Tomorrow might bring a quiet day (doubtful), or another round of international incidents and desperate legal maneuvers (far more likely). In Trump World, one chaos begets another, like a never-ending nesting doll of controversy.

Yours in eternal entanglements and improbable monarchic honors,
Crisis Continuity Coordinator and International Meddling Archivist